Saturday, September 10, 2005

Chart and compass

A little something I worte as I am seeking to trust the Lord at this point in my life while I seek to navigate being a husband, father, pastor and student. Thanks to John Creasy who had our community sing this song a few weeks back.
Doubt and anxiety roll over me
waves thundering on the beach
eroding away vision and passion
tethers tied tightly
souring stomach
waking, wondering, worrying,
contentment a fleeting dream.
Waves loom larger still
white caps of ethics, Greek and Gospels
Booing and bobbing in their swells
will I be able to catch them?
paddling desperately for alignment
adjusting my board just so
what if it passes my by?
what if I catch it?
what if I catch it and
I cannot handle its immensity?
Throwing me into the surf
Spitting me out on the other side
Scraped, cut and bruised
fountain orifice spewing water
Choking and gasping for breathe

Jesus, Savior, pilot me Over life’s tempestuous sea; Unknown waves before me roll, Hiding rock and treacherous shoal. Chart and compass come from Thee; Jesus, Savior, pilot me
.*

Not perceiving
You are my vision
no blindness in you
Not discerning
You are my voice and sift
no confusion in you
Not understanding
You are my wisdom
no unknown in you
Not trusting
You are my trust
no distrust in you
still…
wanting to clutch chart and compass for my own
wanting to see when you have shown
wanting to discern when you have not made known
wanting to go where you have not blown
wanting to know where I am go'in
wanting to see the seas unknown

When at last I near the shore, And the fearful breakers roar’ Twixt me and the peaceful rest, Then, while leaning on Thy breast, May I hear Thee say to me, “Fear not, I will pilot thee.”*

*Ed­ward Hop­per, in The Sailor’s Magazine (1871) and The Baptist Praise Book (1871).

2 comments:

John said...

bj, very nice. Hang in there and trust.

Sarah Louise said...

Lovely. It reminds me of the quote that Marion Edelman uses for the Children's Defense Fund: "Lord, the sea is so big and my boat is so small." Water is such a powerful image always, but especially right now...Fear not, says the Pilot, I'll pilot thee.